CALANGO SECO NÃO, PODE PARAR! Assim terminou o show de Mayara da dupla sertaneja Mayara e Maraiza. A cantora se apresentava no canteiro central em frente a Casa de Show “Lingobar”, ponto de encontro dos amantes da comida farta. Perto do Cônego e também do Rede Mais e Super Show, este foi o local escolhido pelos alunos e alunas do Terceiro Ano da escola. O show era para arrecadar verba para a formatura deste ano. Mas, quando a cantora Mayara estava cantando um funk de MC Pipokinha – que acusou Annita de estar imitando-a – a mãe do aluno do Segundo Ano, que comprou 3 ingressos, duas bokus, três churrascos de língua, e uma indaiá de kissuk de morango, gritou: CALANGO SECO, CALANGO SECO.
A cantora de imediato parou o show. Chorando muito, e com 30 quilos mais magra, a sertaneja confidenciou a Varmirsson, um vampiro dono de uma vila de casas perto da Lagoa do Sapo, que jamais viria na Zona Norte. Nem se Luiz Almir for buscá-la.
Procurada pelos alunos do Terceiro Ano, a Mãe do aluno que fez a injusta compparação, subiu na Moto Uber, junto com seus três filhos em direção a Nova Natal, deixando cair dois churrascos com partículas de gotas salivares.
Em busca de novas oportunidades, do emprego do sonho, nossos alunos ficaram saltitantes e vermifugados de alegria ao saberem que surgiu uma oferta de emprego para “Conselheiro do Tribunal de Contas do Estado do Rio Grande do Norte”. O salário inicial é de quase quarenta mil reais, e uma vez assumindo a função nunca mais será demitido, pois o cargo é vitalício. Juntando todos seus rendimentos, mais de noventa por cento da renda familliar de nossos alunos gira em torno de 5 a 8 mil reais, contando com o pé de meia é claro. Mais queremos mais, nos confidenciou Pedro e Guto, que ficaram com média 3 em Direito Romano e 7 em Procedimentos Cirúrgicos das partes baixas, mesmo depois da reunião do Conselho Escolar.
Esta vaga foi aberta porque o Conselheiro Tarcísio Costa foi aposentado. O Tribunal de Contas do Estado tem como função fiscalizar as despesas e receitas dos estados e municipios. o TCE é composto por sete conselheiros. Entre os requisitos para ocupar o cargo é possuir notórios conhecimentos jurídicos, contábeis e econômicos e possuir comprovada idoneidade moral e reputação ilibada.
E o mais importante. Para ser Conselheiro não tem prova! Não tem prova do Enem, da OBMEP, não tem prova de Biologia, nem de matemática, nem de química, não precisa ler direito, nem muito menos saber por completo as quatro operações de matemática. Quem diz “o emprego é seu” é a governadora. Ou seja, o cargo é ocupado por indicação do governo, é o chefe do Executivo estadual que nomeia. Simples assim. Entendeu papai. Entendeu mamãe.
De olho na vaga, vários pais de alunos do Terceiro Ano me procuraram e afirmaram que irão pleitear esta vaga. É o caso do pai de Artur Lira do Terceiro Ano A, seu Benedito Sebastião de Morais, mais conhecido como Biu do Sarney. Atualmente seu Biu que trabalhava como moto uber, esta sem trabalhar. Sua mobileti foi partida ao meio quando estava com um passageiro em plena avenida Moema Tinoco e quando “deu fé”, caiu num buraco. Professor Padin essa vaga é minha, disse sorridente seu Biu. Perguntei por que ele estava confiante, e com seu notório saber jurídico me disse de pronto. Ora, estamos em ano de eleição, e tudo pode acontecer.
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