ROMARIA POR UM NOVO RUMO

Por

ESCREVO ESTA COLUNA direto de Brasilia, acometido de mialgia e aneroxia somado a intensos distúrbios gastrointestinais. Em um português para sexto ano isso quer dizer uma gripe de lascar e uma caganeira que me deixou todo assado. Na foto acima me encontro na terceira fila por trás da décima fileira. Estou com trajes franciscanos, cabeça raspada no meio do quengo, sandálias Ipanema, apesar de preferir havaianas. Mas meu fervor político clama sabotagem. Por que não estou à frente de mãos dadas com Nicolas e Maltinha? Vocês podem perguntar. Resposta: falta de atributos fotossintéticos que permitam uma paisagem agradável.

Não foi fácil percorrer mais de 600 quilômetros, com ponto de partido do Rabo da Gata até Brasília, capital federal. Motivo da caminhada? Liberdade, Família, ociosidade, meninice, diabruras. Mentor: deputado Nicolas Ferreira – Heroi destemido e serelepe. Durante a romaria o lema era “ninguém solta a mão de ninguém”. Minhas mãos estão cheias de calos. Acometido de forte pensamento coletivo e um patriotismo desenfreadamente absurdo empurrei o senador Magno Malta que estava prostrado e colado numa cadeira de rodas, que com grande esforço percorreu 599 quilômetros sentadinho. Nosso menino de ouro, jovem destemido de caráter duvidoso, afogado de sentimentos fervorosos e simétricos, suou mais. O deputado Nicolas andou a pé, foi empurrado numa maca, percorreu mais de 200 quilômetros numa cadeira de rodas, usou fraldas geriátricas, ficou todo assado e finalisou a romaria em cima de uma carroça puxada por um jumento pertencente a seu gabinete.

Ao chegar no ponto final de nossa santa romaria, Maldizentes atribuíram às descargas elétricas ocorridas em Brasília, soltadas por São Pedro como uma espécie de gás lacrimogênio para despertar a turba. O Diretor marechal-almirante-aviador deste brilhante BLOG discorda veementemente destas babaquaras. Não dê ouvidos a esta oposição raivoza belo deputado com dobrinhas assadinhas, és nosso herói. Um grande herói que a pátria chora em vida e há de sorrir, incrédula, quando o souber morto.

Brasília, 03 de fevereiro de 2026, 137º da República.

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